Battlefield Earth: A Saga Of The Year 3000

Quotes that were… "I am going to make you as happy as a baby Psychlo on a straight diet of kerbango."
And quotes that should have been… "Does anyone else feel like we're on a 'swiftly tilting planet,' or is that just the director again?"

Yuck. This one hurts. Granted, I made it all the way through this film on the first viewing, which can’t be said for some other flicks listed (Mr. Bay). This is John Travolta’s Waterworld, but added to the madness is Travolta’s scientology beliefs (the film is based on an L. Ron Hubbard novel). While BATTLEFIELD isn’t explicitly scientologist, the background doesn’t help a more secular viewer appreciate (actually, hell I don’t know if the scientology background will help a scientologist appreciate it). Besides being way too long and full of idiotic plot conceits (the aliens’ home world explodes if exposed to an atomic blast. The whole planet! Are you serious??? And they supposedly took over the galaxy???) the film is also just poorly directed. Painfully directed. Nauseously directed. Everything is either tilted, tinted, on stilts, or in slow motion. Every shot! This makes the viewing experience just that much more painful, and the film just that much more awful, awful, awful.

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